The teen is pretty good about going to bed at night. He’s almost always in bed before I am. Every night, out of habit, I ask, “you got your alarm set? Got your clothes out for tomorrow?” His answers are always “yes” to both of those.
I’ve noticed since we moved, some mornings he doesn’t come out of the room until 6:15 or 6:20 (sans that infamous 12 SAUSAGE BREAKFAST FIASCO. No, I’m not letting it go. Ever. LOL), and he needs to leave by 6:25 as the bus gets to his stop between 6:30 – 6:35.
Recently, I asked him what time his alarm was set for. He went through this elaborate explanation about setting one for 5:00 and then another one at 5:30, blah blah blah…i tuned him out, because at that point, I just thought, “that’s stupid.” Set one alarm, and get your azz up. Period. Which is pretty much what I told him.
Me: I don’t know how much time you need to get ready, eat breakfast, etc. But you need to take that time frame and work backwards from the time you leave the house. Just set one for 5:45 and then when it goes off you get up, go to the bathroom, splash some cold water on your face and stay up.
And even though I said I wasn’t going to be checking on him, if he doesn’t peek out that room by 6:15 I knock on the door. He will usually say he’s up or getting dressed. This morning, I was in the shower and something told me, the one morning I don’t check on this dude he will oversleep.
I knocked, no answer. I knocked extra hard and when he answered, you could tell he was started.
Me: dude, it’s 6:23? What are you doing?
Him: it is?
I just walked away, because I felt myself morphing into Flora (my mom) and about to start a speech with, “didn’t I tell you to…” followed by “one day you’re gonna learn to listen to me…” sprinkled with “funny how you can get up on the weekends at dark o’clock to play Xbox…” rounded up with “a hard head makes a soft behind!”
Turning into your parents is real, people.
I heard him futzing around in the bathroom and hollered, “it’s 6:25!!! What time does the bus come?” He said 6:35, but I swear he told me before that it was 6:30. Either way, I’m gonna need you to get out this house and get to that bus stop expeditiously.
I handed him his money for his lunch account. “You’re cutting it real close, dude. Have a good day at school.”
I know Samuel L. Jackson narrated a book called, Go The %#*€ To Sleep! I wonder if he’d do a recording for me: “Get Your A$$ Up!” I could play it on the surround sound in the living room at volume 87.